Dr. Evil's back with a review of the Xeenon MPire, a funky device for your car that plays not only MP3s, but MPEG videos and VideoCDs. Not distracted enough by the cell phone? This is the device for you:

MPEG files . . . show up just like MP3s, except a small film logo appears in place of the musical notes. I tried playing back several different MPEG files, some low-quality and some very high-quality. The MPire came through with flying colors, playing all the files without any audio or video stuttering.

You know you want it.

The MPire will even serve as a living room component, if you want, and it's got the potential for massive amounts of storage capacity. Read on for the rest of the story.