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nicateen420
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My horribke fridge and the rommates i live with

Tue Jan 28, 2003 5:47 pm

As i awoke this morning i stretched with my usual laziness and sat there pondering what to do.
"I'm hungry" i said aloud,but didn't know why.
As i reached for the door handle a rancid smell imflamed my nose and caused me to gag.
"What could this be!!!" My heart was raceing, the battle with ceasar had left my weak and frail and i thought this would be the end of me if he had returned to my home.
Slowly I crept down the stairs to take a quick peak and see if it was my worst fears. Had I been forwarned i would have never walked down those stairs and left my roomates to die by this foul beast. Yes it was not the mighty Ceasar who tormented our loft. It was something more feard then a rotten egg sandwich, worse than day old puke on the rug.
It was the chinese,,,,
"This can't be happening!!!" i quickly ran up stairs to grab my disinfecting spray,,which i liked to call excalibur.
The smell was getting worse,,, my arms sagged as i made my way to the home of the beast. The world turned and the floor moved as i walked closer and closer.
I suddenly stop as the door to the refrigerator slow and unmercifully opened with a squeek.
"No no!!!" i screamed.
I had been hopeing for a sneak attack but it must have known i would do such a thing.
The door was fully open now and i could see the foul being for what it was. Week old fish and chamain stared at me from the depths of the monster maker i call my lightless abyss of a frige.
My naustrals flared as i raised my hand to spray my foe,,but as I did this, a drop of drool graced the side of my mouth.
"You tempt me fould beast" i taunted it
"Shut the **** up down there" My roomate yelled down the stairs.
For these where the last words i heard befor i crumpled to the cold ground,,,,,,,


As I slowly open my eyes I am greeted by my foes gruesome visage. My roomate apearently found me on the floor and was standing over me laughing.
"Nooooo! what the hell are you doing!!!" I screamed, and stared at the half eaten plate of chawmane in his hands,,, just to see him gulp downa hefty fork full.
"What the **** does it look like you loonie" he said with a mouth full of my enemy " And how many times did i tell you not to yell at the ****ing refrigerator"
As he said this his face suddenly turned green. His eyes bulged and throat went tense and started to expand.
Quickly i rolled to the side as a fountain of breakfast spewed forth from my fellow abode dweller.
"You have brought are ruin" I whispered
"What is happening?" my in house neighbor weeped
Suddenly his steam pored out of his ears and his stomach started expanding. The house started to shake as i dove behind the fridge.
Then it all stopped,,, the seconds past as cold winter days do while huddled benieth your blanket waiting for spring.
I slowly peeked around the corner to se what had happend to my fungus wary friend.
'THE LORD HELP US!!" I belllowed, for he had turned into a blob of stringy egg noodles with beef eyes!!!
The room suddenly took on a greenish glow and the walls waverd and trembled.
I looked about frantically for something to use against this beast.
"EXCALIBAA!!!" It sat inches away form my grasp which seemd farther than the south pole.
As i reached for the spray can I heard a soft voice
"save me" It whispered.
At that point i didn't know what to do. This large blob of chawmane was slowly inching towards me,,,if i used my weapon would it also kill my roomate that was inside?
"Someone tell me what to do!!!"

this story happend after my foul fight with some moldy ceasar salad
M [email protected], 512 Uber samsung pc 3200
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Having a system crippled by old parts= Priceless
 
Freon
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Tue Jan 28, 2003 6:10 pm

Sorry you lost me after about the third sentence.
 
danny e.
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Tue Jan 28, 2003 6:15 pm

lol me too... except i got maybe four sentences in b4 i called it quits.
You don't have to feel safe to feel unafraid.
 
IntelMole
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Tue Jan 28, 2003 6:22 pm

I read all the way through, very entertaining, except it's chow mein, the soft noodles dish from China...
IntelMole
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Coldfirex
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Tue Jan 28, 2003 6:32 pm

Should we check for grammar?
Your bargaining posture is highly dubious.
 
eckslax
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Tue Jan 28, 2003 6:40 pm

I think we would get about three or four sentences in before the spell-checker gave up. :lol:

Funny story, BTW.
"God created man. Samuel Colt made them equal."

"Government does not tax to get the money it needs; government finds a need for the money it gets." - Ronald Reagan
 
nicateen420
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Posts: 353
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Tue Jan 28, 2003 8:10 pm

ARGH,, i didn't know my grammar was that bad,,,may be look into a speak and spell :o
M [email protected], 512 Uber samsung pc 3200

Uber 1337 Geforce3ti200, AC97 SOUND p4wnz joo, 20 gig maxtor 5400 rpm drive<---own3d

Having a system crippled by old parts= Priceless
 
Aphasia
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Wed Jan 29, 2003 4:34 am

He.... funny.
 
muyuubyou
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Wed Jan 29, 2003 4:51 am

Not bad, but quite hard to read.

2 words: spell check :)
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JohnnyQ
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Location: Cape Town, South Africa

Thu Jan 30, 2003 3:04 am

Dude, you watch too much Manga... :)
Slave to the Bar.
 
Kuhtarl
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Sun Feb 02, 2003 9:44 am

Watch out for the toaster. She torments me on a daily basis.

The refrigerator and I are on civil speaking terms, but are by no means best friends.

The dishwasher secretly hates me.

The microwave and I are planning to run off together.

I'm not sure where I stand with the Foreman Grill. He mutters alot and I can't understand him.
 
IntelMole
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Sun Feb 02, 2003 5:57 pm

Kuhtarl wrote:
The dishwasher secretly hates me.


What's wrong, the dishwasher not getting any? :-D,
IntelMole
Living proof of John Gabriel's theorem
 
David
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Joined: Fri May 31, 2002 8:44 pm

Sun Feb 02, 2003 6:35 pm

That was....interesting to say the least. I managed to read it all, except a few sentences I skipped for time conserving purposes. :wink:
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