65 Comments(s). 2 Pages(s). Showing page 1. [ 1 2 ]

   #32. Posted at 11:56 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Krogoth
If it was an actual product. I would bet that your loony Macoytles would buy them all out and claim them to be best thing since the Ipod Shuffle.
collapse
#32, Serious Krogoth is making typos again. This time, "Macoytles...  :  Meadows  (#63)  «
#63, I CHOOSE YOU, MACOYTLE!  :  Saber Cherry  (#65)  «

   #64. Posted at 12:01 AM on Jan 8th 2009 Edit   Reply
Rakhmaninov3
LOL well this woulda been better (or at least more entertaining) than the lame 17" MBP they revealed
collapse

   #62. Posted at 03:18 PM on Jan 7th 2009 Edit   Reply
Meadows
Not bad, not bad. Helped make my day.
collapse

   #61. Posted at 03:11 PM on Jan 7th 2009 Edit   Reply
provoko
I saw it on Youtube when they put it up the other day, sooooo funny. I love The Onion.
collapse

   #56. Posted at 10:08 AM on Jan 7th 2009 Edit   Reply
bthylafh
I'm struck by the fact Adi hasn't posted in this story.
collapse
#56, I'd guess he's still writing the post. It's a tad slower wit...  :  TravelMug  (#59)  «
#59, Har! Har! Har! Har! Har! -- Too funny!  :  bdwilcox  (#60)  «

   #54. Posted at 02:54 AM on Jan 7th 2009 Edit   Reply
Saber Cherry
I'm still waiting for Apple's buttonless mouse. The one-button ones were stylish, but way too functional.
collapse
#54, that one is coming isn't it? didn't apple file a patent for ...  :  green  (#55)  «
#54, You're thinking of the StupidaMouse: http://web.mit.edu/rede...  :  MagerValp  (#58)  «

   #41. Posted at 02:29 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Wirko
Is there any way to pause the video (with picture) so I can see better what the "Predictive Sentence Technology" brings to us?

Well I managed to catch this one:
The apple was consumed by the amiable crocodile.
collapse
#41, lol did you see the one that said "The Abortion Went Well."?  :  moose17145  (#42)  «
#42, Yup. Eighth predictive phrase down from the top. Classic!  :  cynan  (#45)  «
#41, There are tons of plugins for Firefox that lets you download...  :  Imperor  (#57)  «

   #47. Posted at 06:12 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
michaelmcgo
Awesome Predictive Sentence Technology!

>The ass asked for a better absinthe.
>The babbling baby baked brownies with the amiable crocodile.
>The Althusserian scholar gave his copy of Lacan's "Ecrits" to the abortion doctor.
>The attractive peanut farmer graded the term paper.

When he does the search, these files show up:

Alisonatbeach01.jpg
Alisonatbeach02.jpg
Alisonatbeach03.jpg
Alisonatbeach04.jpg
Alisonatbeach05.jpg
Alisonatbeach06.jpg
Alisonatbeach07.jpg
collapse
#47, Hehe, I didn't notice what those sentences said. I just ROFL...  :  0g1  (#53)  «

   #52. Posted at 09:57 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
0g1
LOL 45 minutes to write an email.
collapse

   #48. Posted at 06:37 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
sativa
To get a good taste of The Onion, check out their paper (yes it is a published paper) after sept 11th, 2001.

http://www.theonion.com/content/index/3734
collapse
#48, check out their paper (yes it is a published paper) Used to r...  :  insulin_junkie72  (#51)  «

   #50. Posted at 08:22 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Smurfer2
Gets funnier the more I watch it. Awesome stuff...

P.S. On a serious note, how did they accomplish that news clip? I at first thought it was real until some of the things they were saying hit me.... (I had never heard of the onion)
collapse

   #10. Posted at 10:37 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
bdwilcox
Best line comes from the sales hack, though: "EVERYTHING is just a few hundred clicks away."
collapse
#10, Ah dangit you beat me to it! For those who missed it, it's at...  :  moose17145  (#35)  «
#35, Pause the video and read the text of the email :) This is...  :  MadManOriginal  (#37)  «
#37, Haha! Good catch! Soo... many... jokes.... must try to...  :  moose17145  (#38)  «
#10, Yep I found that one the funniest too.. "just a few hundred ...  :  equivicus  (#49)  «

   #46. Posted at 05:46 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
bdwilcox
"I never really realized how much I hated keyboards until I saw this thing." Folks, we have a true believer!
collapse

   #44. Posted at 05:41 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
p645n
Only 6 days into January & The Onion has snatched the crown for best parody of the year (& quite possibly the decade!) .
Apple, if they had half a brain, would take this bit of brilliance & run with it -- turning it around with a campaign showing they are so hot they can afford to laugh at themselves.
Well done guys!
collapse

   #43. Posted at 04:45 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
ludi
Available in 3-15 months? Sweet!
collapse

   #40. Posted at 02:10 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Imperor
Wow! At first I just thought "This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen". Being "an Apple product" you never really know... you know?

But this is freakin' hilarious! Had to dl the file and watch it bit by bit.
"The babbling baby asked the aardvark for some absinthe" is a very common sentence! And "Virtually indestructible unless dropped or hit" really signifies some kick-ass quality as well!
collapse

   #17. Posted at 10:51 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Sargent Duck
8GB for a notebook? Isn't that, you know, a little small? And 40GB for $9,000?? Not even Intel's latest and greatest SSD would justify that price.

Although, price and the obviouse fake aside, for arguments sake, how would one type? Doing simple things like surfing the 'net would be a PITA.
collapse
#17, I suppose you could navigate through voice recognition of UR...  :  DaveJB  (#18)  «
#18, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA  :  Kurkotain  (#39)  «

   #36. Posted at 12:17 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
moose17145
Haha it comes with an advanced battery that can power it for up to 19 minutes!
collapse

   #34. Posted at 12:08 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
jstern
So many good Onions, like when Christ returned to the NBA. Anyway, I know it's a joke, but they killed it with the price difference in 32gb.
collapse

   #33. Posted at 12:02 PM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
alex666
Classic Onion. That was great.
collapse

   #31. Posted at 11:52 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
d0g_p00p
That was awesome1
collapse

   #14. Posted at 10:48 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
BoBzeBuilder
Hahahahahahahha...... Am I supposed to laugh? Its not real right?
collapse
#14, With Apple, one can never tell.  :  Philldoe  (#28)  «
#28, That's why I asked if this was a joke because you never c...  :  NeXus 6  (#30)  «

   #29. Posted at 11:49 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
no51
Looks like someone posted a phone cam video of it in action: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KANI2dpXLw
collapse

   #27. Posted at 11:35 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Buub
Brilliant!
collapse

   #26. Posted at 11:34 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
Corrado
4 people have IM'd me the link to this appalled that Apple would do this. I just shake my head and tell the to read OTHER stories from the Onion and then get back to me. They come back 15 minutes later going 'Oh, I knew it wasn't real, but it looked real!'
collapse

   #25. Posted at 11:25 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
SomeOtherGeek
LOL!! Yet another definition for stupid!
collapse

   #24. Posted at 11:24 AM on Jan 6th 2009, Edited at 11:25 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
neon
"To reduce energy use, screen goes black after four seconds"

Tee hee
collapse

   #23. Posted at 11:15 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
bittermann
Ah "The Onion" does it again!
collapse

   #22. Posted at 11:12 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
PRIME1
I'm not surprised Apple is coming out with this. I suspect there will be lines outside of the Apple stores to get one despite its high cost and short battery life.

Imagine all the docking stations and related crap that will follow.

Still Jobs looked good and he did seem excited about this new Mac.

With so many people used to this wheel I bet some will be typing like pros.

~ Kudos to the Onion for breaking the story~

EDIT: It looks like Amazon already has them on pre-order
http://www.amazon.com/dp/047027817X/
collapse

   #20. Posted at 11:04 AM on Jan 6th 2009 Edit   Reply
wingless
THE SUDOKU KILLER!!!! HAHAHHAAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

This is the best thing I've seen on the interwebs this year.
collapse
#20, "Police warn that the Sudoku killer will kill either 1, 4, o...  :  bdwilcox  (#21)  «
65 Comments(s). 2 Pages(s). Showing page 1. [ 1 2 ]
 
Name/Password: / Remember
Reply to:
[click to clear]

[RED] [GREEN]
[BOLD]
[ITALIC] [STRIKE]
[UNDERLINE]

Notice: All posts should abide by the rules, please.
Note: Ctrl-Enter submits the post. (In IE)
DThread keys: Click on a reply to position the blue bar. 'A'/'Z' move it up/down.
Jazztags: (they MUST be closed)
    r{ red }r     g{ green }g     /[ italic ]/     *[ bold ]*
    _[ underline ]_     -[ strike ]-     s[ sample ]s     o[ spoiler ]o  q[ (QUOTE) ]q