It's all over soon


— 11:42 AM on September 9, 2000

Humanity is about to come under vicious assualt from the world's other inhabitants, according to all the signs. The Onion has the scoop on the worst threat, but Stuart seems to think the monkeys are in on it, as well. Stock up on tin foil, and make the most of the weekend—it may be our last.

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