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chuckula
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Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 1:46 pm

Dear parallel-universe TR,

This is Chuckula except not the one from this universe. You see, in my universe we have malls that are really annoying but that I'm forced to visit while my wife gets her hair done.

Apparently your parallel dimension has them too, but there's a horrifying difference. You see, in my universe there are "Apple stores" that have oversized spaces fronted by glass walls with a small number of products arranged on benches. Hipster types mill about trying to get you to buy whatever Apple needs sold without any discounts.

I could handle the Apple stores but I knew that reality had been shattered when I saw the Apple store... THAT WASN'T AN APPLE STORE!

Image

I was shocked. All the pretentiousness of an Apple store.... but by Microsoft! My mind raced as I struggled to find an explanation. After applying Occam's Razor (do you have that in your universe?) I quickly realized that the most rational explanation is that I've been sucked into an alternate universe!

I need to get home. I'm afraid that if I meet my alternate self that he won't even be evil. I need your help!
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whm1974
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 2:55 pm

So how did you get here?
 
Captain Ned
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 3:10 pm

whm1974 wrote:
So how did you get here?

Oh, c'mon. You do know that Earth is in a plural zone, no?
What we have today is way too much pluribus and not enough unum.
 
UberGerbil
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 6:38 pm

You know they've been around for a while, right? The one at UVillage here amuses me because (a) it's exactly across from the Apple store, and (b) they put the VR tryout area right in the front. So you can stand in the Apple store and watch be-headsetted newbs fail around while immersed in XBox.
 
bthylafh
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 7:19 pm

An alternate universe where this doesn't belong in the Back Porch, apparently.
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Scrotos
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 7:53 pm

Oh crap, I must be in the wrong place, too! Where I am from, we have these all over the place and Apple is just a record label!

Image
 
Redocbew
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 8:00 pm

whm1974 wrote:
So how did you get here?


He ran fast enough until he created a breach.
Do not meddle in the affairs of archers, for they are subtle and you won't hear them coming.
 
the
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 10:38 pm

Looks like Iowa.
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UberGerbil
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 11:43 pm

Redocbew wrote:
whm1974 wrote:
So how did you get here?

He ran fast enough until he created a breach.

the wrote:
Looks like Iowa.

So... he drove a DeLorean at 88mph into a cornfield full of ghosts of dead baseball players?
 
kvndoom
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sat Mar 10, 2018 11:47 pm

Scrotos wrote:
Oh crap, I must be in the wrong place, too! Where I am from, we have these all over the place and Apple is just a record label!

Image

I'd guess you are from 1998.
A most unfortunate, Freudian, double entendre is that hotel named "Budget Inn."
 
Redocbew
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sun Mar 11, 2018 12:12 am

UberGerbil wrote:
So... he drove a DeLorean at 88mph into a cornfield full of ghosts of dead baseball players?


Probability dictates there is an Earth where this could happen.
Do not meddle in the affairs of archers, for they are subtle and you won't hear them coming.
 
BIF
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sun Mar 11, 2018 1:48 am

In my universe, we have CompUSA, Radio Shack, and Circuit City stores.

But I think Circuit City is on its way out, because they just started playing a Cars song in their television advertisements. I think they're trying to make people forget that their prices are too high and they put way too much pressure on the customer to buy extended warranties.

Looking forward to going to TCBY tomorrow... 8)
 
anotherengineer
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Re: Help! I'm from an alternate universe!

Sun Mar 11, 2018 9:31 am

chuckula wrote:
Dear parallel-universe TR,

This is Chuckula except not the one from this universe. You see, in my universe we have malls that are really annoying but that I'm forced to visit while my wife gets her hair done.

Apparently your parallel dimension has them too, but there's a horrifying difference. You see, in my universe there are "Apple stores" that have oversized spaces fronted by glass walls with a small number of products arranged on benches. Hipster types mill about trying to get you to buy whatever Apple needs sold without any discounts.

I could handle the Apple stores but I knew that reality had been shattered when I saw the Apple store... THAT WASN'T AN APPLE STORE!

Image

I was shocked. All the pretentiousness of an Apple store.... but by Microsoft! My mind raced as I struggled to find an explanation. After applying Occam's Razor (do you have that in your universe?) I quickly realized that the most rational explanation is that I've been sucked into an alternate universe!

I need to get home. I'm afraid that if I meet my alternate self that he won't even be evil. I need your help!


Come to Hearst Ontario, and you will be spared any such paradoxes.
Life doesn't change after marriage, it changes after children!

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